He alone ... is the Observer,
He alone is the observed!
There is none ... but He ...
in the World of Existence.
- Ibn al- Arabi
Therefore, dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you. For those who are near you are far away... and this shows that the space around you is beginning to grow vast.... be happy about your growth, in which of course you can't take anyone with you, and be gentle with those who stay behind; be confident and calm in front of them and don't torment them with your doubts and don't frighten them with your faith or joy, which they wouldn't be able to comprehend. Seek out some simple and true feeling of what you have in common with them, which doesn't necessarily have to alter when you yourself change again and again; when you see them, love life in a form that is not your own and be indulgent toward those who are growing old, who are afraid of the aloneness that you trust.... and don't expect any understanding; but believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.
I've realized we give our girls dreams that may not come true. Like you can become an astronaut & what not. Girls boys are equal but they have commitments that demand otherwise, like kids & home.
How do we balance the dream & reality?
Our education system as well as work places, act blind to this.
How many boys who want to become astronauts become astronauts?
The ratio of un-met goals isn't starkly different between the genders.
The issue arises when we, in an attempt to make future a pretty sight for the kids, create an alternate reality world. Our job is not to provide them with dreams. Our role is to make them understand the virtue of commitment and the honesty of act. Whatever they do, be it flying a spaceship or raising a toddler while plucking cotton in a cotton field, do that knowing fully well that you're doing your best.
The problem is that we place our goals outside ourselves :)
Jobs - Careers - Position - Status - These are, at best, the addendum. Whenever we encourage children to dream in terms of these we put a limit on their potential as a human.
Our Prophet, whom we call the best sample of a human, tied his own shoes. Washed his own clothes. Ate nothing but dates dipped in water. Wiped his blood when the body was pelted with stones.
Where were the dreams? Did he not have any dreams?
He had. And his were like we should have ours - he was assigned a job, he HAD to do it to the fullest of his capacity.
If they have dreams to fly high, it is beautiful.
Tell them to grow their roots first. So that one day if the wings can't take the pressure of the opposing gale, they don't fall face down. And this can only be done when their strength comes not from their target residing far away in future, but from the character they're harboring right now.
I had a friend who couldn't get into medical college. She spent 4 years coming to terms with the set back.The point is, how good is the dream of becoming a certain professional when ander ka insan is so vulnerable? :)Ander ka insan strong karna asal issue hai. Professional qualifications, for girls as well as boys, come second.Quality of the person, that is our only reality.Make the reality strong and dreams will mould themselves around.The first hero speaker I listened to at my first Rahbar cycle had shared something that I find absolutely beautiful ....He said that his father had always taught him one thing, that if everything in life fails and he - the son, ends up with nothing but a "گنے کے رس کا ٹھیلا" (gannay kay rus ka Thaila), his should be the best drink serving Thaila of the town.Dil ka rus nikalna, ganna samajh kar; the old man had taught his son.I loved it. :)