Saline Words

"Writing for me was always a great stress reliever, a way of dealing with pain." - Bret Easton Ellis

Thursday, the 15th of March 2012...

When expiration and existence came like sweeping waves, crashing over me. 

An experience whose electricity is still running through my nerves!

It was an ordinary day, a rather lazy one. My second mug of coffee was half way through when the cell beeped at 11:13 am. I glanced over the screen and found kid's school name flashing over the screen. Something just ticked a time bomb inside me. It didn't take even a second for the call to be answered.

hello?

Is this angel's mother?

Yes.

I'm angel's teacher.

Is everything ok?

Can you come to school?

Is he hurt?

Yes.

Is he bleeding?

(Pause) A little.

Is he crying?

He was. But he is settled now. He has a chocolate in his hand and we are sitting in the office.

I'll be there in 30 minutes. Could you please tell him that his mama is coming?

I will.

I had left my office before clicking 'End Call'.

What followed were the 12 longest minutes of my life! 

It took the next 12 minutes to reach his school, and a score of times I experienced extinction.

As I entered the school gate, a school staff stepped out of the Admin office across the school yard with two blood stained towels in hand. Another cessation!

I stepped in the office at 11:25am and there, just on the extreme left, there he was.

The next 4 hours I kept doubting God's capacity to grant me enough strength to enable me keep acting as the tenacious support for my son. 

I wanted to cry with him. To just hold him in my arms kissing his blood stained neck... and cry!

36 hours have eloped since then, and I still can feel the salt of the tears held back, in my throat.

But, I didn't cry.

I couldn't cry, for his confidence in  me as his support asked me to remain strong.

This is when he slept later at home. 

Do you see that tightly snuggled li'll kitty? :)

"Mama, teacher Yasmeen (his headmistress) said, when the child's parents gonna see him like this, they'll have a 'hard attack'", he revealed to me as I tucked him in the blanket.

He decided to be the 'Baba' (father) of the kitty, "bilkul jaisee ap meri mama ho" (just the kind you make my mom)

I'm not sure if it would actually be a great idea to be just like me, but I sure loved the way he snuggled the kitty in his arms.